summary

i want, crave;
i tumble over rocks in my dash
i close my eyes
to his averted eyes
and also his fear

he pulls me in
and i want to love him
"right";
consequently
i vanish before our eyes.

so, now
forced to awake from that dream of pursuits attained...
the peace we had:
real yet
the ideal we tried to be:
was not (sustainable)



My life without his hidden struggles was/is too alone; vibrates with loss
the face i watched
as he left was not a mask - he too wore grief.

so, now
all i can do
is fight the battle in which he's left me -
to be a better person,
whether for him or the next

with whomever i will love again
that i can try to be a lucid, gleaming, Hector.